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Quote Of The Day: "Wakey, wakey, wakey - let go your cocks and grab your socks." Andrea Levy, Small Island
| 130907 · WHAT I HAVE LEARNED AT COLLEGE |
"Kitchi lofass a shegithe," or "Kicsi lófasz a seggedbe", translated from Hungarian to mean, more or less, "A small horse dick up your unmentionable."
I have a v. legit reason for knowing the above; the phrase is hurled by the main character in Pynchon's Entropy, Meatball Mulligan, at Sandor Rojas when the latter asks Meatball to make him a drink. It's kind of like the other day at Usdan when I asked Sam to tie my shoelaces for me and she was all omg fuck you.
Yeah anyway so classes are in full swing now and I'm reacquiring the skill of prioritizing all the reading I have to do, juggling between length, level of interestingness and urgency. My Metaphor & Modernity class so far has set the most WHEEHEE readings like the Pynchon matched with Hawking's exploration of The Arrow of Time and entropy from a scientific pov. But the professor is a bit neither here nor there, which is a bit frustrating cos there's so much I want to have explored, and when the professor doesn't really facilitate or guide the discussion, the focus switches randomly and in the end, quite aimlessly cos student responses go from "We don't really need time" to "Aubade's name actually means a song to herald dawnbreak" to "What was happening in 1965?" At the last question my mind automatically chimed, "Singapore's independence!" which startled me a little bit. So conditioned, tis.
Example of why course selection is important is evident in fact that Sam and I are both doin 5 classes but I'm consistently sleeping past midnight trying to finish reading while Sam gets to do fun equestrian things :\ But I want everything I'm doing, I do. Twould probably be a bit easier to deal if today wasn't also the first day of fasting, I think. Weather damn cold.
| 040907 · |
Because the queer community at Wes is pretty rah rah, we had this BiLeGaTa (bisexual lesbian etc etc) workshop thing to educate ourselves about the queer lexicon, including the use of the gender neutral pronoun Ze. So instead of saying 'He's on his way' you would say 'Ze's on his way'. In Singapore people would just assume your English is damn lousy but anyway.
At brunch today
Erwin: This is not papaya, it's melon.
Jayvan: It's not melon there's another name for it.
Erwin: Melon!
Jayvan: No, it's a cantaloupe.
Erwin: This is Wesleyan, it can be whatever it wants to be. It can be Ze.
Tomorrow classes start, finally. Hella excite, hella scared, hella everything. But it's good to feel things again after about a week of just snoozing through life. This is college so I just had my last school orientation for entire life o.O
Today Sam and me swung by Hansel's sweet little space atop WesWings and were struck by his disgusting overachieverness. It's never nice to be confronted by the limitations you set on yourself and your expectations, like I would never dare to convince a professor to let me into a class usually attended by post-graduates because I couldn't bear the thought of not living up to all the hyperbole I'd spew bout meself.
Either way though I'm glad for classes to start so I'm compelled to make friends outside comfort zone. Wah that day Chinese House damn Singapore lah. Drink Milo and play Scrabble, just like I would at home with my mother. I done won too :]
| 250807 · !bile |
At orientation today we had to introduce ourselves in a circle (haha, original I know) and say our name, where we're from (which is so much more interesting cos at Wes you get things like Turkmenistan or Barbados as opposed to RJ where you hear RGS, RI, VS, AC rinse and repeat), what we plan to major in, and our favorite dessert.
Guy from South Africa: My favorite dessert is uh... I don't really do dessert.
FRIED GRUBS AND PLANTAIN! Haha my typecasting isn't even up-to-date, the stuff I 'know' about 'Africa' is all taken from The Grass is Singing and Heart of Darkness.
How Facebook Contributes to Society
Vickie, Freeman sophomore from Hongkong: So, you and Samantha from Singapore are best friends right?
Me: o.O Uh.. yah. How did you..?
Vickie: Someone else told me, think they saw you guys on Facebook.
Noumaan: Are you dressing up for tonight's dinner? Everyone usually dresses up and looks pretty.
Me: *noncommittal noise*
Noumaan: Jourdan says you're a fashionista.
Me: o.O
Noumaan: He told me to look at your photos on facebook.
'Fashionista' YUCKS. I hate the word. As I hate hell, all Montagues, and thee. But orientation is a time when small talk is glorified and so I just smiled bracingly and moved on.
When I walked up to campus today it was foggy, when we were walking from Usdan to the Davison Health Center it was cold, and by the time we left the HC for the Butts parking lot it was bloody hot. The earth la, what have we done.
Anyway I think I'm beginning to get used to being randomly greeted by strangers in a way that wouldn't happen in Singapore cos if you did think to say hi to someone you just happened to make eye contact with, their eyes would probably narrow suspiciously in response. People seem so much more pleasant here, and there's genuinely good service where you feel they're being nice to you because they're sincerely trying to make you feel at home, and not because they want a GEMs rec. Just now a young dude with super 90s MC Hammer hipster pants and a baseball cap worn backwards jumped in front of me to say "how's it going" and then jogged after me to ask "hey, you need any help with that?" which was a bit befuddling cos all I was carryin was my handbag and a small plastic bag full of stationery o.O
| 240807 · short and.. sweet? |
It would be a lot easier to lose myself in the hustle and bustle of orientation if I were already left by myself in Middletown, but because losing myself in orientation tomorrow means leaving my mother alone in the hotel room with loneliness, an uncharged phone and no charger there's a lot of pressure weighing down my head and heart. Therefore life kinda sucks :\ It is so Brave Orchid/Maxine Hong Kingston except now I don't really want to grow up and grow away anymore.
| 230807 · relaxicab, like taxicab! |
Since neither my mother nor I has them driving chops, we've been forced to move around in cabs in a state where a 10 minute ride (to Kmart in Cromwell, in search of boring ass things including bath towels and Martha Stewart Everyday blankets) cost us $17 AMERICAN DOLLARZ. Also, every single time we called Middletown's Executive 2000 taxi company, which is about 4 times so far, we got ourselves a Pakistani driver who was v pleased to find out that my mom and I are Muslim and that a Muslim sister (that would be me) is pursuing higher education at place of great renown like Amerika. Turns out the dude who owns Executive 2000 is from Pakistan so presumably he recruits from his homeland la. Everything should start at home. Today's Pakistan driver who took us to Westbrook also told me that his brother runs a convenience store near Wesleyan which sells halal sandwiches or something, so my mom was hella chuffed.
Went to the Tanger Outlets at Westbrook today which has factory outlet stores for usual preppy places like Hollister, Old Navy, Gap, J.Crew full of blondes natural and dyed doing back-to-school shopping. There was also a Rue 21, carryin the same sorta stuff as Forever 21 but of a slightly better quality, I think. In further proof of my v v rusty knowledge of French, I completely failed to realize that Rue = Road in french and was wondering why anyone would name a store after sorrow and regret.
I has no peekchas yet cos lazy to take out all the USB crap to upload dems. Should probably get around to it soon though because Middletown it be cute. Lot cuter in pics anyway, since you can just admire its quaintness and not be sucker punched by how unmodern it is. Especially coming from Singapore where everything keeps changing for the better, faster, higher, newer. Middletown doesn't even have American staples like McDonald's or Burger King or Starbucks. The closest you get is a Dunkin Donuts. I mean like people always make digs at how Starbucks and McDonald's are colonialising the whole world but at the same time you're used to seeing them, no? It's nice to get away from stock cities for awhile, but feels weird to be living someplace where things you take for granted are missing.
Ugh I very stupid never bring earphones so now I can't listen to music on my laptop cos mother wouldn't like da noize. Hopefully roomie don't care la.
Sam and I have been reunited! And it feels so good. She got to hear my accent ~in action~ hahaha and then told me in our usual Singlish-French that she detested it. Having Sam really rocks la, cos I can inhabit certain characteristics when interacting with the people here and she's the only one who will be able to appreciate how amooz it is.
Uh in other news I still planning to move to blogspot but maybe when I alr hooked up laptop to charger in my dorm room and have time on my hands to transfer the layout over to blogspot sign up for account and all that jazz.
| 230807 · Paying my dues |
Thus far I've:
I am so tired. But there is no rest for the wicked and so ima leave in couple mins to buy me some linen and pillows and all that housewifey type crap. I'm already craving bubble tea and the MRT :[
| 150807 · SAD ENTRY TIME GODDAMN. |
So I finally went down to Sim Lim Square which is one of those idiotic IT or electronics malls that give 'shopping' a bad name even if I am technically shopping for something there. I was there because the world and its ridiculously rapid technological advances seem to dictate that I ought to have a webcam to go with my previously-working-just-fine Vaio. I don't ask much of the gadgetry I do deign to get, just that it is as foolproof as possible and doesn't take up too much memory space, heck care how much clearer it is or what newfangled crap has gone into its makeup cos it's not like I'll be able to figure it out.
Anyway my dad picked out some V-Gear TalkCalm Tracer CCD thing over the Logitech one I wanted which I couldn't object to since it seemed to work fine on the store's display notebook. But then I brought it home and hooked it up to my laptop which was where the trouble started. At first it was alright then I hit the Snapshot button once and the entire laptop went into this epileptic fit. A pop-up window appeared with my ONE intended snapshot, and then it blinked furiously until the Snapshot count in the title header of the window hit 300 which was when I started flailing about trying to ctrl-alt-delete which wouldn't work, then alerts popped up to tell me I had insufficient memory which I couldn't do anything about because the snapshots just kept on coming and then I yanked out the camera plug with so much force I knocked a stack of files right off the table but somehow, SOMEHOW, the snapshot count just kept on climbing. I shut it down so now my laptop is quiet in a manner that makes me think of that substance they can inject into you to make you paralyzed yet conscious.
Of course, this had to happen just as I'd transferred everything from PC to laptop and was happily congratulating myself on making the clean break.
I despise technology why can't we all just stick to fountain pens and scented paper.
| 140807 · back to the grindstone |
My brain embraces the news of my assigned courses the way I expect some women embrace a new dieting regime. Trepidation and reluctance to give up well-loved bad habits mingling with excitement and expectation of rewards to come. Harhar, not the best of analogies given my ~history~ but anyway this am what I gots:
COL 110 01 The Enlightenment Printy,Michael O. .M.W... 01:10PM-02:30PM, Loc:BTFDA413
LAT 101 01 First-Year Latin: Semester I Parslow,Christopher .M.W... 11:00AM-12:20PM, Loc:SCIE139; .....F. 11:00AM-11:50AM, Loc:SCIE139
It's one thing to be interested in Latin but quite another to be confronted with the reality of taking exams in it. Suppose it'll turn out alright but I just escaped quite scathed (got such word?) from the French placement test listening section. We had to listen to a scène dramatique, and about two seconds into the thing I realised I wasn't goin to comprende much so I just let the characters drone on in the background and did eeny-meeny-miney-mo with the options. Brain cogs, wherefore so rusty!
Haha I ought to make my entries alternate perfectly between excitement and sadness. Otherwise my mooch entries will feed Rachel's mooch entries which will feed my mooch entries which will.. etc etc
Yikes this week is totally Pragmatism vs. Nostalgia. I shall do as Rachel does and make me a list.
| 130807 · twentyfirst tenfortyfive a.m. |
Subject title is what I found myself repeating ad nauseam today to relatives who don't know me very well so all they had to ask was, "So when you flying?". After my answer they give a sagely nod and say "Take care" whilst pressing folded notes into my hand. It all got quite annoying during the six hours I sat through the kenduri but now in middle of night with only my thoughts and emo electro music for company I think I might miss the whole motley crue la. Sorta. I won't miss them individually but I'm comfortable when their noise is pressing in on me from all sides. The ones I will miss the most are the little ones like Dinnur and Aini. Dinnur's only 2, by the time I come back next summer she might not recognize me anymore and will shy away from me the way she does from strangers. Just now I randomly flopped down onto the big cushion on my floor and she said v adorably, "Shirin sleep? Dinnur give you blankie." And then she put tissue paper blankie over my face. So cute la :[
Oh my younger sis was ready to kill me by the end of the night again cos people kept giving me money and attention. Then during the prayer-reading session thingy when asking for blessings and stuff my grandma said my sister's name wrong confusing her middle name with mine which made Naz so upset she spent like 45 mins crying out back. So drama. But I hope her life is happier while I'm gone lah, then maybe when I get back we can be all sisterly, like.
Anyway I just really need to get going instead of being trapped in this limbo of packing and anticipation and last minute attempts to spend time with friends who're all being stolen away by the commencement of school term at mosta the local u's. All this non-activity's fraying my nerves because all I can do is swing erratically between excitement and fear. Afian psyched me up with tales of exciting orientation and parties, but then Christine's blog post made me sad because yes we will all have to look at fresh faces and force ourselves to write possibility into them instead of what I did in RJ which was basically.. ignore most faces except those of my pre-determined friends'.
There are chapters I wish I could have closure to properly before I go, but as of now doesn't seem likely. I feel like doing a Jerrine and putting pen to paper for a select few. But no time and.. no strength.
| 100807 · is there no one else? is there no one else?!?!?!! |
Spent National Day wearing red and white and shopping in JB. My dad took the little flag off of our car to ward off any unnecessary provocation and on the way back kept saying, "The SECOND we cross the causeway, we put up the flag ok." Then of course at home we caught the fireworks at the end of the National Day parade broadcast and went away until Troy started. Stupid Channel 5 cut out so many of the hotter Achilles scenes.
Bored SMSes from an NS boy in camp
Me: Haha are you watching Troy? Is such an odd movie choice for national day esp since they're commemorating NS, just serves to highlight NS' impracticality
Afian: Without ns they would not have a credible and deterrent force to protect Troy
Afian: The Trojans try out diplomacy before aggression, failing which they will secure a swift and decisive victory
Afian: If Malaysia attacks now we are screwed. I'm watching Troy and so is everyone else.
Afian: Hector equal Li Hong Yi that is why they are showing this movie.
Does that make Andrea Andromache?
It was also quite jarring to learn that I would have to miss my cousin's (who is my age) wedding next February because ima be in college learning stuff. It's weird that you can share a childhood and then bang, take completely different roads. Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and I chose the one that leads hopefully to magical Oz.